Autistic smol human bean ~
I read a short story where a woman character “always looked forward to her period” because it was “a reminder of her womanness” and YES! The story WAS in fact written by a male!
*my uterus hits the self destruct button and tissue and blood begins falling out of my vagina*
*music drops*
*Shania Twain voice* Let’s Go Girls
I know we’re having a good time laughing it up at Bezos possibly losing half of his money in his divorce but please let’s stop and take a moment to realize that losing 67 billion dollars will have absolutely no impact on his quality of life, which makes for a rudimentary but functional litmus test for determining whether or not someone has too much fucking money
A while back I heard my friend (male) insult another dude by saying, “You look like the kind of guy who wouldn’t go to Wal-Mart to buy his girlfriend a box of tampons” and I still think about that crowning insult sometimes
My dad once called another guy “someone who thinks loading the dishwasher once in a while makes him less of a man”
I like your dad already
one time my dad’s boss was giving him shit for always leaving work early so he could get home and help my mom with me when i was a newborn and his boss said “i’ve never changed a diaper in my life” really proudly and my dad responded “i’d be ashamed to ever admit i was that worthless of a husband”
brooklyn 99′s first bleep was a bleep done well
This might be my new favorite B99 joke of all time.
Vegans of tumblr, listen up. Harvesting agave in the quantities required so you dont have to eat honey is killing mexican long-nosed bats. They feed off the nectar and pollinate the plants. They need the agave. You want to help the environment? Go back to honey. Your liver and thyroid will thank you, as well. Agave is 90% fructose, which can cause a host of issues. Bye.
Beekeeper here! Just wanted to say that the fact that vegans won’t eat honey is very silly. Harvesting honey does not hurt bees. The invention of modern moveable-frame hives means we can remove a selected frame, extract the honey and return it without killing a single bee.
If we destroyed the colony to harvest honey there would be no bees for next year, and beekeepers are incredibly careful to keep their bees healthy and thriving. We take *excess* honey that they don’t need, and it stops the hive from becoming honey-bound, meaning that there’s so much honey the Queen has nowhere to lay eggs. And if the winter is harsher than expected and the remaining honey store runs low, we feed the bees plenty to make sure they survive. We also make sure that pests are controlled, bees are treated for disease, and the hive is weatherproof and in good repair, all things that wild bees struggle with.
Keeping bees in properly managed hives where they don’t starve or die from preventable disease is much better for them than being left to fend for themselves, and they’re far too important to be left alone.
All the fruits and vegetables that vegans *do* eat couldn’t exist without bees, and the hives which pollinate those crops also produce excess honey which the beekeepers can sell to help keep themselves and their hives going.
TLDR: BUY THE HONEY, HELP THE BEES.
Some of yall really have no empathy and yall think its funny and cute to be mean and its really ugly and disgusting and i deadass hope someone beats your ass
Basilosaurus, which means “King Lizard,” was actually a whale that lived 30-45 million years ago. Scientists have also just published a paper indicating that it was likely apex predator.
(image: Voss et al., 2019)
As I scrolled, each vertebrae descending down my mobile screen, I grew more and more ready for this bony fucker to be one of them “do you love the color of the sky” posts but naw, just a long bony bastard.
✨Do you love the vertebrae of the spine? ✨
I love watching documentaries about space starring Neil DeGrasse Tyson on Netflix.
lindsayjones
2008 vs. 2018 - Different weight, same awkward white kid.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BshmJTnH34W/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1vy4nowkj4jt4
